Drugs On Demand

I recently discovered the joy of digital cable. I will no longer be blogging normally because I'll be sucked into the world that is "On Demand." It's truly the most wonderful thing to happen to television history. At least for now because I'm still in the honeymoon stage with it all. I can't help it, who wouldn't be dazzled by DVR and HBO and MTV and whatever other 3 initials tickled one's fancy?

But here's the problem, On Demand has ruined a perfectly good pop song that I've been enjoying quite a bit as of late.

This lovely woman pictured below


has been keeping me quite entertained with her little "I love you, I love you, I love you" song. So when I saw her video available at AOL Music On Demand, I definitely clicked on it! Because I love that song! It's the perfect little happy pop ditty! Yay for the British invasion!

Incidentally, Ann was over from her summer "abroad" (and I use that term loosely) and so she had missed the joy of rapidly singing "I love you" over and over again. So I introduced her to this video by saying, "YOU MUST LOVE THIS SONG OR YOU'LL HURT MY FEELINGS." I'm a good friend.

So the video begins innocently enough with the lovely Ms. Bedingfield in an apartment and getting ready for her day's events all while lip synching. Typical video, I thought. Except that BGF asked the terribly accurate foreshadowing question, "What's up with all the boomboxes?" And indeed, there were like 50 boomboxes in that lady's apartment. But I just blew it off as some stupid video "concept" that I don't get and really no one in America does except for the director who has a "vision" and "insight" into what the artist's song means visually. Whatever.

So at this point, Ms. Bedingfield has moved on to the beach and is singing with her boombox as if she's poor and needs people to drop money in her cap. Fine. Whatever. It's just a video. Still a good song.

And then the boombox became animated and grew feet.

I'm not kidding. All of a sudden, the boombox was outlined with those cheesy cartoon lines from 80's MTV heyday. And it then GREW ANIMATED FEET AND STARTED DANCING. And Ms. Bedingfield was okay with this! In fact, she encouraged this drugged out behavior!

It was only downhill after that. The boombox made friends and soon Ms. Bedingfield was the pied piper of boomboxes and they followed her and defended her and all the boomboxes had distinctive feet and loved her and she loved them, loved them, loved them because those words are her own.

It was AWFUL. What is wrong with these people? How the hell is that a concept? Dancing boomboxes? DANCING BOOMBOXES? In the real world!? And other people saw it and were perfectly ok with it unless their own boombox grew legs and followed Ms. Bedingfield. Then they were mad because they wanted their boombox to dance for them! Boomboxes don't dance people. They never have and they NEVER WILL. One can only hope that the digital revolution will soon take hold and that boomboxes will become obsolete. Then Ms. Bedingfield ill-fated American debut video can be put to rest. FOREVER, FOREVER, FOREVER.